Hi Sara!

First of all, I got my 1st post deleted because I didn’t provide an email! Doh!

And to answer your question to Brandi — we’re not sure when we’re getting married but hopefully once we get more established in the coming months, we’re going to do it!

Thank you for your blog — it does give some good insight on my birth-city from a non-native point of view. And honestly because I can say that I’m hardly a native anymore, I understand things from a more Western point of view anyway.

I grew up there in the 80s but left in 1990. I visited for the first time in 1995 and the air quality was dramatically worse (no blue sky). I think having gone back every few years, with the most recent being in Spring 2010, I think the air has gotten better, but as you said, it does depend day to day as well. I hope it keeps improving!

I’ve read your article on Christmas and the differences between you and your boyfriend. I think bridging the gap culturally is extremely important and I think that if both of you are able to cross that bridge together you will be improved in almost every possible way — I can say that from experience. Yes, I wasn’t too familiar with a real Christmas until I met her (and this is in the US) and neither was she with Spring Festival, but it just helps tremendously if there is a common interest to understand and gain each other’s backgrounds on both sides. I think motivation, affability, humility, and patience are key.

Of course, living in a western society, I found myself wanting to be more western than eastern, just so that I can be more adapted to life here. But if the environment was the other way around, I can see Brandi becoming more Chinese too — but this absolutely dictated by necessity I think.

Anyhow, that’s all for now, as I can go on all day about stuff like this. I wish you the best of luck with your boyfriend and hope to read some more interesting stuff!

[Reply]

Sara Reply:
July 17th, 2011 at 12:37 am

Hi Hao!

Sorry that your first comment was deleted!

Really nice to hear from you as you are originally from Guangzhou. I absolutley agree that “common interest to understand and gain each other’s backgrounds” is needed to have a good relationship especially when it’s a multicultural relationship. There is much to learn and much to adapt when dating someone who is from such a different culture. Because me and my boyfriend are living in China I think our life is more on the Chinese side now. But I hope that he can visit Finland soon and fully learn the background where I’m from. It’s something that’s hard to explain, you have to see it yourself.

Thank you very much Hao for joining the discussion and sharing your ideas. I hope to hear from you and Brandi once in a while to know how’s everything going :)

[Reply]