Dating Chinese Men,  My Life

Our Finnish-Chinese Love Story

finnish chinese love story

Yesterday, one year ago, I met my boyfriend Alan.

It was 8th of December 2012 and I was invited to a Finnish pre-Christmas party in Foshan. It was held in a luxurious expat home of a Finnish family and I brought my Finnish classmate with me as well. It was amazing to get to eat those familiar Christmas dishes again, chat with fellow countrymen and listen to Christmas songs.

Then we got the bad news that our Japanese friend had broken up with his girlfriend. They had been together quite a long time, but for some reason it didn’t work out. He was feeling down, wanted some company and invited my classmate to the Perry’s near our university. So after Santa Claus shared his small gifts to the kids and adults, me and my classmate head back to Guangzhou.

We found our Japanese friend in a table with another Japanese Guy, a Chinese guy (Alan!) and a Chinese girl. We introduced ourselves and I just couldn’t help but to ask the Chinese, as they were sitting next to each other, if they were in a relationship. They laughed and said they were just friends.

We ordered food and drinks while chatting away and trying to cheer our friend up. In the end he wasn’t really on the party mood and was the first one to go home. The Chinese girl also went home quite early, my classmates disappeared in the crowd and so me, Alan and the another Japanese guy were left at our table.

The three of us continued discussing random topics that I can’t even remember anymore, but me and Alan started to talk more and more with each other. The Japanese guy was a real party animal and wanted to head to a club and convinced us to go too. We took a taxi to the party pier and the boys paid 150RMB each to get into the Wave.

In the noisy club with flashing lights and people surrounding us from every ankle, Alan saw his chances, took my hand and kissed me.

Few days later our common friend, the heart-broken Japanese, even offered to introduce other people to us as he wasn’t convinced we would be a good match. I remember he asked me if I had considered Alan’s family background, so Asian of him!

Luckily we didn’t listen to his advice and have been together ever since.

This blog post was inspired by Linda’s love story. Please share your own in the comments, I would love to hear it.


  • Linda D.

    congratulations! our anniversary is almost the same date :) hope you had a great day together and many many more :)

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    It’s funny how the dates are so close together! I wish you and your bf the same too :)

  • Kaiser


    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    看起来有一些博文你还没看呢 :) 你可以多看一下这些博文: 尤其是这篇博文: 就清楚多了 :)

    Kaiser Reply:


    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    哈哈。不知道是很有意思还是很奇怪 :)

  • chinaelevatorstories

    Congratulations! My husband and I also got to know each other about a year ago (we had met 1 1/2 years ago, but only ever exchanged a few sentences when we ran into each other). I can’t believe it’s only been a year :D

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    So how did your second meeting went? After just exchanging those few sentences, how did you end up meeting again? :)

    chinaelevatorstories Reply:

    He was the one sitting right next to me at my first day of work :D. After the first week of working there, he took me to shops selling stuff for making handicrafts at the weekend. And I invited him to have dinner at my place with two other friends of mine at my place (he ended up cooking most of the dishes). That’s how it all started, although at that time I wouldn’t have guessed the outcome. Here’s a longer post about how we met:

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    What a story! I had to go to your blog and read that blog post, and the post about your engagement too! So romantic, I had no idea you two were so fast in your relationship :) But I guess that when you know, you just know ;)

  • Olga

    Is December the month of the Western-Chinese couples? :-) A few days ago was my wedding anniversary, and in a few days it will be 9 years since we have been a couple.

    Congrats to you both! I loved reading your story (and he’s 很帅 ;-) )

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    There’s love in the air in December :)

    Congratulation for your anniversary as well! I’ll pass your words to my boyfriend ;)

  • Marta

    Should I be embarrased to confess that I met my Chinese boyfriend through Momo (the awful dating app)? But we have been together for more than one year and a half now… haha

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    No need to be embarrassed on my blog :) I have friend who found her boyfriend through online dating site, they have been together for 9 years and plan to marry next year. I guess you never know where you can find that special one.

    Btw, your blog looks very interesting Marta, unfortunately can only enjoy the photos :)

    Marta Reply:

    Thanks! I’ve been thinking about starting a blog in English but I can’t find the time or the inspiration…
    I just noticed that in the last picture you are wearing 情侣装,哈哈

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    Funny that you noticed. Actually buying those matching t-shirts was my boyfriend’s idea 哈哈.

  • Ellen

    Awww, your story is so sweet, Sara! I’m really happy for you both. I think, me and my BF are very old-fashioned compared to you, yet I’d share my story anyway…
    I met my Chinese boyfriend almost 2 years ago at the university and we started dating some months later. I’m not even very sure, when’s our anniversary since in our case things developed slowly and unclearly. It was a nice sunny spring day when my BF bumped into me on the university campus and asked me whether I’d like to have a walk some day. I didn’t mind. We had a wonderful walk+chat on the “some day” and had a hot drink later in the evening. Some days later I invited him to enjoy some ice cream. Already before that we were exchanging awfully a lot of mails with ideas and thoughts (which is what captured my soul). At some point, I felt that we are more than just friends. At the same time, I had no idea what was going on, because we had no physical contact – it took him ages even to start holding my hand! Hence I was terribly scared to “date” him, because he was from a completely another culture that I knew very little about. In order to get some insight into Chinese dating culture, I actually searched for some academic papers on the topic of “Chinese dating” and “Chinese relationships” :D
    Little by little we have grown and developed together. I like that he is different. He is kind of a traditional Chinese, yet at the same time he’s open-minded and speaks very good English.
    Although we have been together for 1.8 years, I’m sure it is just a beginning :)

    Sara Jaaksola Reply:

    Thank you for sharing your story Ellen!

    I think your boyfriend is very cute and sweet with his traditional courting habits :) Long talks, walks outside and all that, kind of romantic I would say.

    Did you happen to find any academic papers on those topics btw? :D

    Leo Reply:

    Your bf sounds like me,always abit shy when dating a girl,that‘s how a good man should be in China,otherwise you can easily running to a playboy,trust me,chinese playboys are far worse than anyother places.
    You have a good taste in chinese man,that’s all that need to be happy in China

  • myself

    Why all these white bitches don’t find white man to marry?

    yourself Reply:

    Your cowardice and insecurities reeks on you.

    Kaiser Reply:


  • Guest

    Sweet! I met my Finnish boyfriend on fb, he came to visit me here in Peru-Lima, now in 2 months and something I’m going to Finland to see him again ♡ we’re so in love that I can say it to the entire world! But I know I shouldn’t tell my feelings at all in Finland, people are jealous :p kidding^^